Before You Tie the Knot
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Jaron Carson
“When I first saw her, I thought she was mean.”
Chuck Denney
Aren’t they cute?
Shaleah Boykins
“He’s not my type. That’s the first thing that I said.”
Chuck Denney
Apparently he is her type now, because Shaleah Boykins and Jaron Carson will soon be husband and wife. The two Memphis teachers say they want their marriage to last.
Jaron Carson
“You have to be sure that’s the person you want to be with, absolutely sure. That’s the person you want to be with the rest of your life.”
Chuck Denney
Many couples just plan a wedding rather than think about the marriage that comes afterward. But Jaron and Shaleah recently went thru a pre-marital counseling program called “Before you tie the knot.” They believe there are important pre-marriage issues to discuss. For instance, number of children.
Jaron Carson
“At first, I wanted four, and she looked at me kind of crazy. She said let’s start with one.”
Shaleah Boykins
“I think all couples should do some kind of marriage counseling because a lot of couples are not surviving marriage. To me, I know what when I stand up there and say ‘I do,’ it’s important to me that it’s forever.”
Chuck Denney
Tennessee’s high divorce rate has been a state embarrassment and country music cliche’ for a long time. But since 2000, it’s gotten better every year - part of a national trend.
This program looks to build on that.
Cathy Faust
“We cover four areas. We talk about communication, naturally, handling conflict, parenting and money matters.”
Chuck Denney
UT Extension teaches “Before you Tie the Knot” in Shelby and other Tennessee counties. Couples learn about so-called “I” messages rather than “you” insults - a proper and civil way to disagree.
Cathy Faust
“I feel upset when you’re an hour and a half late or I was concerned that you forgot to do thus and so rather than you’re always late or you never remember.”
Chuck Denney
UT Extension also trains the trainers in “Knot,” including many church leaders, who then work with engaged couples.
Pat Jennings
“Several times during the session we ask ‘Do you still want to get married?’ Because we want people to understand that this is a marriage course. However, you may not choose to get married once you finish - because we paint a real picture.”
Chuck Denney
Shaleah and Jaron know every day won’t be all sunshine and flowers. But they’re prepared for a future together, one based on honesty and grounded in reality.
END
NOTE: Couples who complete "Before You Tie the Knot" with an approved provider can receive a discount of $60 on their marriage license. The course usually runs four to six hours.
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